Life is beautiful,

There's a certain freedom that comes with writing a blog no one's going to read.

I'm gonna kill you.

I'm gonna sue you.

Sometimes I print pictures of your girlfriend and jerk-off all over them.

Why do black people smell like greased up farm animals?

We may never know. But anyway, why do I waste my time? Cause fuck em, that's why. It's not like I have anything better to do. I've viewed every page on the internet, twice. The porn I viewed three times.

I spend way too much time on the internet. You know what I've discovered about the internet? It's for porn. Then there's LiveJournal, a place where I can write blogs about porn. Oh, and there's Google, a porn search engine.

If you don't watch porn, you're giving aid and comfort to terrorists. Or something like that.

Now I'm supposed to insert a picture. This one always makes me laugh.

I fucking hate nature. Don't give me that "without nature we wouldn't be here" shit. I'm an existentialist. Without us nature wouldn't be here. If you didn't exist, nothing would exist for you, so think of it that way.

But I just wanted to say that nature fucking sucks. Winter is better than summer because the cold kills most of the shit that bugs me about the outdoors. This time of year is the worst.

For the past couple of weeks, everywhere I go in my yard I keep walking through spiderwebs. No, I'm not having tactile hallucinations. I try to watch where I'm walking, but I never see them until they're all over my face. Why do spiders only build their webs 5 ft 6 in off the ground? Just to fuck with me. So there's one reason I can't stand nature.

Another thing: fucking moths. I stay up all night every night. I have to go outside to smoke, so every night I sit on the back porch every hour and have a cigarette. The whole time, I'm swatting fucking moths away from my face. Why do the little cocksuckers seek out my face and fly directly at it?

I've been to people's houses that have a roach problem. That's not nature's fault, that's just trashiness. I don't play that shit in my house. If I see one roach crawling in my kitchen, I burn my fucking house down and move. How do people live with bugs?

Some people leave their window's open in the summer. Then they have flies buzzing around their house. They walk around with flies on their faces like Ethiopians. WTF is wrong with people?

It's not just bugs that I hate about nature, I hate the dirt and the trees and the grass. When I finally own my own home, I'm cutting down every tree on my property and I'm pouring concrete over all the grass. I wish the world was made of steel and concrete.

So maybe we need nature. That doesn't mean we have to wallow in it.

FUCK CHRISTIANITY, FUCK ISLAM, FUCK JUDAISM, FUCK CATHOLICISM, FUCK PROTESTANTISM, FUCK SATANISM, FUCK BAHA'I, FUCK BUDDHISM, FUCK SHINTOISM, FUCK HINDUISM, FUCK SCIENTOLOGY, FUCK GNOSTICISM, FUCK MORMONS, FUCK SANTERIA, FUCK SIKHISM, FUCK BABISM, FUCK WICCA, FUCK JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES, FUCK PASTAFARIANISM, FUCK JAINISM, FUCK TAOISM, FUCK ZOROASTRIANISM, FUCK THE INVISIBLE PINK UNICORN, FUCK CONFUCIANISM, FUCK KABBALAH,

AND FUCK YOUR RELIGION, TOO!

You know, it's kinda difficult to write the "about me" part on social networking sites when you're not about anything at all. The "interests" part is easy enough for me. Fapping. That's relevent to my interests.
"About me" is the place where you must analyze your own personality and sum it up in a few sentences. I don't even think "about me" very often and I hardly ever think "about anyone else". People are basically anonymous to me. I don't mean Anonymous in the "is legion" sense of the word, just anonymous. That's not saying anything bad about people, that's just how I see (or fail to see) others.
"About me" says that I hate everyone. That was very true a few years ago, but I'm not sure if it still applies. I don't even care enough to hate anymore. I think I've mellowed out in my old age.
I fear that I am a genuine sociopath. I don't feel the need to hurt anyone, but it's funny when it happens. We are all sociopaths that try to hide it. How many of us would like to kill someone just to see how it feels? I may still get my chance.
The world is full of evil people and I'm one of them...